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I'm bored and it sucks (but better than scared, stressed or weepy and so I'm still grateful).
In Yangon for work and things are not exactly urgent and so I struggle to fill up my days at the office.
I don't like having team dinners because I'm socially awkward (but I have to go to a dinner with my boss tonight).
I've been binge-watching tv shows in the evenings until it's time to go to sleep. And checking my email every few minutes to check for updates on Vietnam.
I miss my dogs.
That is my life right now.

Riverdale

Feb. 11th, 2017 03:07 pm
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Why does Archie have to run around shirtless in the middle of the night?
Is the show trying to be ridiculous?
Tsk tsk

tell me

Dec. 14th, 2016 09:34 am
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Random updates

9:34 am: ticked 3 things off my to-do list for today. Now time for a short break. 

<3

Dec. 11th, 2016 07:43 pm
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I've bought luxury goods online before but it was my first time actually walking into a Prada shop today.
The staff were excellent - a group of them so attentive, and helpful. I had an idea of what I wanted but they didn't have the exact piece, so they offered their own suggestions (one of which suited my needs) and I came out of it with a beautiful black nylon backpack <3

It goes well with my shoulder bag as well.







Fashion

Nov. 29th, 2016 08:43 pm
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I used to care, and then I stopped. And when I say "stopped", I mean I almost completely stopped buying new clothes for a couple of years. Then I got stressed because of the interview, got sad and so -- Im back to caring (too much). The upside is I can talk about this with my more fashion-conscious friends so I am not alone 😂😖
It's still challenging because I avoid products with leather or fur (the boots are faux leather; the coat is wool - I know, not good, but it's nearly impossible to find good coats that aren't wool).







In other news, I seem to have lost my interest in food.
I mean, I eat because I get hungry but it's like I get full after a few bites and so I think I've lost a little bit of weight. This isn't humble-bragging. I'm happy I lost weight but I'm also wondering WHY I've lost my appetite

Family

Oct. 4th, 2016 10:43 pm
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I wanted donuts so my twin brought home a whole box.
He also bought me a book I was interested in:




And then today he backed into a metal sign and broke the right tail light of my car.
Tsk.

Cry

Oct. 2nd, 2016 04:32 pm
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Hurting for Daiichi huhu

Girls

Jun. 13th, 2016 11:15 am
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I just returned from an exhausting 8 day work trip. So exhausting that I started becoming weepy during the trip and Ive remained in that condition since coming back. Im very grateful for the opportunity of course and it is just nuts because the past two times I was on mission; it appeared that Sho-kun was also in the same area for work. So near yet so far. T_T

But - happy to note that my Arashi obsession has calmed down significantly. It's always good for everything to be in moderation anyway.

Highlight of last week was of course the surprise bridal shower we held for my dear Chinky. I just met some of the other girls in the entourage last week and I thought to myself that her friends are such good-looking people. Im the least good looking one hehe. She's going to have such a gorgeous entourage (not counting myself hoho) - I need to hit the gym again and reduce my ice cream intake :p










/rest

May. 31st, 2016 10:24 pm
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Life is good.
Major deliverable submitted last week, praise the Lord. I can take a break from that for a while, pending questions/requests for revision.
Got a present for the kids of the lady who has been helping take care of our household matters for more than ten years... that felt good. Sometimes I feel like there is no act of kindness that is completely unselfish because you still do these things to feel good or to ease your suffering. Like my donations to animal welfare organizations and sponsorship of rescued animals - I can't really call it unselfish, because seeing suffering animals depresses me. And doing something for them helps ease my pain. But this present for our ate's kids -- I feel convinced that it's one thing I did without getting anything in return (except, obviously, now I can write this and feel good about what I did).
But I do a ton of stuff for myself as well, come to think of it. I treated myself to a major thing this week. And then... I'm back in Ho Chi Minh (but this is for work). Still, it was such a comfortable trip!
And Viet Nam... for some reason... always feels like home.
I lived here for a few months in 2011 and made some very good friends; is that why?
I love it here.
I was semi-forced to stay in an expensive hotel tonight because this is where my boss is staying and we're leaving for the field early tomorrow and it would be too much hassle for me to take a taxi from another hotel to her hotel... so I gave in and just booked here as well. Because of this, I will not be able to save any of my per diem. Oh well. Sometimes, we just have to choose the path of least resistance.

I've also been thinking... I was talking to my mom a few weeks ago about how I've never made any friends by myself in the gym, even after going to the same one for almost 9 years. My mom, on the other hand, quickly made acquintances at the gym she's been going to for just two years or so. I asked her why, and she said that maybe it's because I don't look at people. And it's true. I don't go to the gym to make friends but the real reason I don't make eye contact is because I am a very insecure person. It's true. At the office, I generally don't look at people either. So after my mom brought that bad habit of mine to my attention, I tried making eye contact with people I meet in the corridors at work, and found that it really does make a difference. So yesterday, I ended up talking to two random people and all because of making eye contact. To be honest, I was only that pleasant because I mistook them for someone I ought to know (namely, my mentor's husband), so I was like all smiley and they were all smiley in return, and then I was like "are you Frank?" And they were like "no, I"m not Frank -- Oh, so that's why you greeted me so nicely". haha :)) So yeah, I should be friendlier.

Another lesson learned - prioritizing my health has helped me claw back my sanity. I burnt out but I couldn't afford to stop working, which the doctor actually said I HAD to do since I was in really bad shape, but I tried to do things in moderation - I've been paying attention to signals from my mind and body; I stop working when I hit a certain point of not thinking quickly enough; I've been exercising a little bit. And I feel so much better. I feel that I'm more productive as well. So now I live in fear of burnout. And only because it hurts my productivity. I'm not sure if that's ironic. But whatever. As long as it helps me stay healthy.. :))





listen

Feb. 18th, 2016 05:26 pm
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Bon Iver on March 5 in Makati.
M83 on May 4 in Hong Kong.
Fuji Rock (Sigur Ros) from July 22-24 in Niigata.
Radiohead on August 20/21 at Summer Sonic (Chiba)

Then, non-music related right now but who knows what will happen right?
Iceland and Finland with a few of my best friends in November.

So I'm seriously burnt out right now but it looks like there will be so much to make up for it later in the year.
And I need to earn, obviously.

*Edit: when I'm exhausted and feel like scum, even just chatting online with my friends makes me feel much better.
<3

faraway

Feb. 15th, 2016 09:01 pm
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Today's happy story of the day is c/o one of my best friends who is currently going around Japan with her fiance. (luckkky girl - she has been there for maybe two weeks already).

Anyway, she actually looks Japanese, and today, she dressed up as a Maiko and went on a photoshoot around Kyoto. I'm sure that people probably thought she was a local and apparently, lots of people were taking pictures of her. Her fiance however is covered with tattoos - including sleeves on both arms. Given that, we were joking that she might want to watch out for photos of themselves on strangers' social media posts with captions like "Maiko with gangster companion". LOL.

That is all.

Back to work.  
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And you left with your head filled with flames
And you watched as your brains fell out through your teeth
Push the pieces in place
Make your smile sweet to see
Don't you take this away

- Neutral Milk Hotel, Two-Headed Boy Part 2
--


Got sent a reminder on the above this morning by way of a message from an old friend (the wonders of modern technology!)
Realized again that there's really so much suffering that just happens on the inside, and what may seem insignificant to us  may be a big deal to others. Nothing can be taken for granted and there are (almost?) always chances to do good.
Thank God.
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As a break from work, I have decided to jump into the (relatively mild) uproar over Arashi's leader's new drama; leading lady; their apparent chemistry (in one of the group's TV shows); how said leading lady supposedly looks like his ex-gf (whom he has previously said was just a friend) and, therefore, they will probably end up dating, falling in love, and getting married.

1. As with the entire prior-to-Miyagi fiasco, this has polarized fans, which is well - the most negative thing about this, I would say.
2. Let's get real - Arashi's career rests significantly on the emotional connection they have worked hard to build with fans. Therefore, can anyone expect anything other than emotional reactions from fans? I don't think so. Is it sad for leader? Of course. But he has also benefitted through the years from this emotional connection and must take the bad with the good - as does everyone else.
3. On the point where leader should be able to have the freedom to do whatever he wants - yes, but in the same line, others also have the freedom to react. Everything has consequences. Will the consequences be reasonable in everyone's view? Of course not. And fans on both sides will continue to be polarized over this, I expect. Tsk tsk.
4. Are emotional fans not real fans? (see point 2 above).
5. And, also, all the fuss is also ending up as publicity for the show. Some people who may otherwise not have cared, may end up watching out of curiousity.

....and I shouldn't actually be taking the time to write this, but I'm procrastinating from things I should be doing. hehe.

Captain

Feb. 6th, 2016 09:00 pm
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Key to  my hear -.. I mean house.



Because I truly believe that Ohno is the cutest guy ever. For real. Adorable even in his awkward age and just getting better with age. <3

fresh

Feb. 6th, 2016 08:23 am
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Saw the below picture here on tumblr, and it got me thinking that I want to add plants to all my working areas. I want to start taking care of desk plants - like small succulents? I've been thinking that I should be more hands on with our garden at home.



The below from this list also makes me happy! (although the title of the article is a bit bitter: "19 tiny plants to cheer up your sad work desk") - I will request some to be sent down from my hometown :) <3



Back to work

baby

Jan. 24th, 2016 11:25 pm
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I fear that no life will ever be like this again
Cause your love kept me alive and it made me insane

--
Random points:


  • Took almost the entire weekend off, but now have to work at  midnight to make up for it

  • Finally watched GANTZ. I semi-regret it. What a depressing story. I don't like seeing sad, heartbroken, beaten-up Nino.

  • Told S I don't know when I will be back.

  • I miss Bek.

heart

Oct. 12th, 2015 08:38 am
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The kokoro no sora pv gifs appearing on tumblr are heart-stopping.
The boys are so cool <3

That is all.
Back to work. 

On Sunday

Sep. 20th, 2015 03:59 pm
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Criminal Minds Season 9 Marathon!
And for the first time in years, I don't have to worry about getting some emergency email that will require me to suddenly work late on a weekend.

<3
Oh yessss.......................................................
I may take a nap later on.
Oh yesss........................................................

Thank you God.
<3
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Wrote this in response to a link on facebook describing "Five Books that Dump You into a Pit of Despair":

I tend to stay away from books that I know will be absolutely depressing, because I really don't like sad stories. But I read the Handmaid's Tale, and it didn't quite 'plunge me into a pit of despair' (I actually found 'The Robber Bride' more emotionally affecting). The 'sad' books I've read that stand out because of how they affected me are 1) 'Waiting' by Ha Jin; 2) 'The God of Small Things' by Arundhati Roy; 3) 'Shalimar the Clown', by Salman Rushdie; 4) 'A Separate Peace', by John Knowles; 5) 'The Good Earth' by Pearl S. Buck.
'Cloud Atlas' by David Mitchell was pretty sad as well, actually. The movie is very different.
Recently, 'The Snow Child', by Eowyn Ivey.

As for painful reads - 'The Poisonwood Bible' by Barbara Kingsolver. I never finished it.
Frustrating - 'Deathless' by Catherynne Valente


I will update with more details on each novel tomorrow.

Did some quick internet research on one of the books listed on the "books that will plunge you..." site - "The Girl Next Door", which was based on a true story. The interpretation as well as the true story are both unbelievably horrifying. The movie, "An American Crime" was also based on those same events. *shudder*

--
I was able to get some work done today, but was not able to finish everything I wanted to.
A Filipina lady I met the other day (staying at the same hotel) told me this morning that I "work so hard" (she's seen me working on my laptop during breakfast two days in a row). I hope I can still be considered hard-working. I worry about becoming lazy, losing focus, not being as efficient as I used to be.
No evidence of that so far... no one has criticized me at work, and I only have one project that is seriously behind schedule, but slipped deadlines are not always my fault...

I'm worried about this one project. I feel we really need to push back the date of project closure, so that we have a little room to breathe. I will email people on this tomorrow. :(

Now, sleep.
I woke up this morning right before my dream reached its climax -- I was just about to step into a Sigur Ros concert. For some reason, in my dream, Arashi was also scheduled to hold a concert in that same city, and I was thinking that they (Sigur Ros and Arashi) are somehow always linked. In real life, however, my (true) love for them is probably the only link between the two groups. :))

G'nyt.

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